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Sucre, Bolivia – Amid the Cambridge Analytica scandal, the founder of Facebook Mark Zuckerberg last night took a redeye to Sucre, a city in Bolivia, in an attempt to escape coming charges. But he could not resist the tentation to post some photos of himself with the local population on Facebook – and that’s how the FBI, in close collaboration with the Interpol, found him. “Actually it was just an intern wasting her time on Facebook” declared Sergej Sprudel, Head of IT Chases at the Bureau: “She got tired...Continue reading »

Springfield, Il – Schools and offices are to remain closed until further notice also in Indiana, Illinois and Ohio as the iPhone zombie epidemic is heading East after having infected the entirety of the West coast, Quebec and Yucatan. “It’s an apocalypse come true” claims Dr. Rochius Blanmonger, Head of Apple Related Diseases at the CDC, “as more and more people keep on spending their entire life watching the screen of their smartphone”. Infected citizens are provoking an unprecedented stream of accidents...Continue reading »

Washington, D.C. – Netflix didn’t greenlight the project of a TV show hosted by Barack Obama and the former President decided to sign for WWE. His stage name is going to be “Super Bario”, a villain of Italian descent, with the final move “Superpizza”, where he will splash on opponents as a big, twisting flying pizza. As one of the youngest presidents in history, Barack Obama was thought to have a bright TV future in front of him. The path of conferencing and donations had already been beaten by illustrious predecessors such as Bill...Continue reading »

Chicago, IL – United Airlines is prone to weird incidents. After dragging off a passenger from his seat and experiencing a scorpion invasion, the airline went on a killing spree. Victims include a giant bunny, a dog put in the overhead locker, and just some more dogs of all races killed in the most sadistic ways – frozen, scared to death, eaten. “But we want to go the extra mile” claims Debra Valpolicella, Sadist-in-residence at UA “and we will equip our crews with whips to lash passengers every now and then....Continue reading »

Yekaterinburg, Russia – For once the believers in occultism have been proven right: the “Orbs”, those strange spots that appear every now and then in photos, seem to be magically attracted by dirty camera lenses. “It’s a first in the history of science” claimed Prof. Ivan Ilic, an aging academic that started his research at the Science Faculty of the University of Yekaterinburg in 1974. The professor wanted to give up multiple times, but his assistant convinced him to keep on researching. “And in the...Continue reading »