Aleppo, Syria – It took some time, but finally the truth has been unveiled: Saddam Hussein was really hiding WMD somewhere. The fact that the weapons were not in Iraq but in Syria might explain why the 2003-2011 war and US occupation was not enough to retrieve the hidden arsenal. “It seems we have been looking into the wrong place for the whole time” claims former Secretary of State Colin Powell “as we searched the entire country with a fine-tooth comb and ended up with a couple of firecrackers. We were in the wrong...Continue reading »

Berlin, Germany – A joint Chinese-American speleology expedition revealed that some ravers entered Berghain at the opening of the club in 2004 and never got out. “We believe they have been living on vodka-tonic ever since” claims Prof. Lu Yang, director of the mission, “together with a crunchy mix of MDMA and speed”. The researchers had to enter Berghain drilling a hole into a side wall because their nerdy academic appearance would have proven a no-go with the infamous Berghain bouncers. But such effort has been...Continue reading »

Palo Alto, California – Few analysts actually understood the words of Tesla’s CEO Elon Musk as he claimed he would “personally take over” the production of Tesla Model 3 in April. He didn’t mean just to manage the production process: he fired all the personnel and he is all alone working in the factory, from screwing screws to pumping tires once a car is finished. “The incredible thing is that Super-Musk alone actually managed to increase the problematic production of the Model 3 to more than 2,000 cars per...Continue reading »

Tacoma, Washington – It took years of researching, but the truth has finally been unveiled: cats are an alien race successfully enslaving mankind. “What else would you think of a living thing that makes you obey to all it wants?” asks Prof. Michael Berenfor from Tacoma University “It is clear: they want food, you give them food. They want cuddle, you cuddle. They want sex, and they moan like there’s no tomorrow and you find a mate for them”. The cats epidemic has already taken over the largest part of the...Continue reading »