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Des Moines, Iowa – Ever wondered why in Sci-Fi films all droids speak with that balmy British accent? Are you curious to find out why humanoids met in the most remote corners of the Universe have this tendency to talk as if they were members of the English royalty? “It is a decision humanity is set to make in 2020” claims Prof. Rodrigo Anapurna, head of robotic language research at Des Moines Community College. “It is meant as a joke to future American astronauts, that will hibernate for a couple of generations and...Continue reading »

Wuhan, China – Chinese authorities are investigating Li Chen, a resident of Wuhan, in order to understand what just exactly was he thinking when he concluded that eating a live bat was a good idea. “We believe that he thought the risk of causing a pandemia and the global collapse of the economy was bearable compared to the thrill of tasting the raw, warm body of a flying rat” believes Arthur Cho, head of the Corona investigative unit of Chuan. Li Chen defended himself claiming that all he wanted to do was shooting...Continue reading »

Santa Fe, New Mexico – Independent researchers from Santa Fe University have come to the decisive conclusion that the Coronavirus epidemic has been introduced by Facebook as part of a project to eradicate real human contacts from the face of Earth. “Just think about it how smart it is” claims David Gress, heading the research at the Marketing faculty at the university. “Facebook at first eliminated the need of phone calls, then moved on with eliminating the need to communicate with words – a plan called...Continue reading »

Berlin, Germany – Dating start-up Parship has been covering the walls of Europe calling for help: on its platform there is some guy that supposedly falls in love every 11 minutes, leaving ex-lovers in despair after such short-lived romances. Beathe Usa, the CEO of Parship, is desperate. “This is mining the credibility of our platform”, she declared. This guy uses multiple accounts to drive girls and boys to believe to his truest feelings, just to abandon them 10’59” later”. Clearly enough, the guy seems to have almost unlimited...Continue reading »

“Marriage Story” by Noah Baumbach (US, 2019, 20 minutes too long) with Scarlett Johansson, Kylo Ren and Laura Dern. On Netflix. Some actress (Scarlett Johansson) claims that she’s not happy anymore with genius director husband in New York (Kylo Ren) and takes their son away to Los Angeles and hires a shark lawyer (Laura Dern) to claim that the son is hers and basically she is free to do whatever she wants because she needs to pursue her acting career, since as we all know New York is no film city apart from –...Continue reading »