Mount Graham, Arizona – “We finally had an explanation for all those strange sightings in the last years: it was alien starships coming to our planet in order to seize our resources and eat us like appetizers” claims Ronaldo Rincon Jr., Chief Observer at the Mount Graham International Observatory in Arizona. “They had everything ready: cannons, laser beams and all the rest. We had not weapons that could match them guns”.
But then, as in the plot of a Hollywood blockbuster, something unexpected happened and saved the day.
The largest starship started intercepting TikTok and Rincon Jr. observed a unique behavior. The vessel stopped and stood still for some moments, as if uncertain about what it was seeing. Then it turned left and right, as if to ask other vessels for an opinion. But then it intercepted the “Milk Crate Challenge” and then, very slowly, the vessel turned 180 degrees and took its way back to outer space.
Soon, all the other companion vessels turned and followed. “They were slow at first, as if they didn’t want to be noticed. But then they started accelerating until they reached 17 times the speed of light, possibly in order to travel back in time and make it back to the time they hadn’t seen TikTok yet.
“You know” adds Rincon Jr. “we all thought TikTok was dumb and it probably is, but it saved the day”.